Sticking with the original structure of the Pickup Podcast, I'm going to provide my friends with a social toolbox. You'll need the fundamentals of an effective interaction in order to start taking control of your social settings, leading interactions, giving value, making someone's day and ultimately, being selective. Sounds like a lot? Well, it's not all that complicated. Last week I gave you a few concepts and techniques used in meeting someone during day. Yet, some people have a hard time in beginning a conversation with someone anywhere and anytime. Yes, it's easier said than done but after dissecting this, we can make it even easier done, than said. Also known as opening or using an opener we must come to realize that we successfully open someone as soon as they become aware of our presence or 'exist' to them.


Either through eye contact, or by being scanned over peripherally a man or woman has essentially opened you. As once said by my close friend and role model Joshua Pellicer, "If 15 women see you walking into a bar, then you have successfully opened 15 women." Your mindset when making eye contact, waving, clinking drinks at the bar should be one of a party host. You can use this, as well as other frames of mind such as a being member of staff, club promoter, doorman, birthday boy to your advantage. That will make it a whole lot easier for you to walk up to a group of people clink drinks, cheers and say "Hey, how's it going? Alright, see you in a bit", without waiting for a response and instead, expecting a good response. If you were to receive a negative response, your mindset should be a truly surprised one.

Wrapping up this first installment of the toolbox series we come to the conclusion that the opening is the quickest and least threatening part of the interaction. If you continue to greet everyone who looks approachable, has open body language, that makes eye contact with you, than when the person who seems interesting to you is in sight, you'll be able to accomplish the same. We here at The Art of Charm call this running short sets. Your aim should be to get at least one sentence and smile at each and everyone from one end of the bar to the other. We call this running the room. There are many concepts that make short setting an attraction enhancer but I only have time to cover a few. Anyone you greet and make quick interactions with will remember you throughout the night and you can see why this will work in your favor. Not only, will you believe you know everyone (making everyone approachable) but everyone will believe that you work at the bar, allowing you to use one of my favorite openers: "Welcome to the bar! I'm glad you made it".